Rumpelstiltskin Revised

This children's play is a different version of the fairy tale Rumpelstiltskin. In this story, the miller's daughter wants to be an author- she also has a crush on Stilts, a little man who can spin straw into gold. This 3 act play is a bit more than an hour long. Here is an excerpt from Rumpelstiltskin.

Act I, Scene II: Tavern. Tom , Dick, and Harry are sitting around a table, pretending to sip from beer mugs . BETSY is standing at the bar OR nearby.                   

T: So I says to myself, Tom, I says, there’s got to be some way you can get those two partridges in one shot. So what do I do? I-
Enter ALFRED BRAGSWAY stage left
Ha & Di: Hey, Alfred!
T: Come have a drink, Alfred!
Di: Yes, sit down.
Al: Hello, Tom. Dick, Harry. (pulls out a chair and sits)
Ha: Betsy! Another drink, if you’d be so kind!
Bet: I’ll have it out in a minute.
Exit BETSY stage right
Ha: Now go on, Tom. What did you do?
T: Well, I aimed at a rock between them. I pulled back the bowstring-
Al: Why, I’m no mean shot at the bow myself. In fact, just the other day-
Di: That’s very interesting, Alfred.
Ha: What happened then, Tom?
T: Well, I hit the rock so hard (with the arrow, I mean) that it split right down the middle. Then, the two pieces flew in two different directions, hit both partridges, and one of them landed on a rabbit passing by. So there I was- wham! With a couple of plump partridges and a fine fat rabbit. I took ‘em home, and my wife cooked ‘em up for supper.
Ha: Now that’s what I call a good day’s hunting! What d’you say, Alf?
Al: Well, Harry, it’s a mighty good story. A mighty good one. But for myself, I can hit a falling acorn dead center with an arrow. Why, I’ve done it with my eyes closed! I’ve done it-
Di: (in stage whisper) There he goes again.
Ha: (in stage whisper) Just don’t say anything about his daughter.
Enter BETSY, carrying a mug
Bet: Here you are, Alf. (sets down the mug)
Al: Thank you kindly, Betsy.
Bet: How have you been, Alf? I haven’t seen you of late.               
Al: Oh, you know, been busy, very busy. Business, you know.           
Bet: And how’s your daughter?
T, Di, & Ha: Oh no!
Al: Well, you know, my daughter is the fairest young thing ever seen. Why, when she walks by, the birds break into song. And she’s so accomplished! Why, just the other day, she made such a dinner as the king himself would be proud to have at his table. She can spin wool into fine linen thread, aye the finest ever seen. And-
Bet: Wait a minute. Wool into linen? But- linen doesn’t come from wool.
Al: See? I told you she’s skilled . (BETSY, TOM, DICK, AND HARRY look at each other, roll their eyes, shrug their shoulders, etc.) You know, she hardly spun at all before my wife died, but now... one of these days some lord or other will see her work, and snap it up! I wouldn’t be surprised, no I wouldn’t!
Bet: Well, it sounds like she’s mighty skilled-
Al: That she is. Why, just the other day-
(TOM, DICK, and HARRY stand up)
Al: Why, where are you going, lads?
T: Work to do.
Bet: (aside) Humph! He never did a day’s work in his life!
Di: Places to go.
Bet: (aside) First time I’ve heard of it.
Ha: People to see.
Bet: (aside)Who’d want to see him?
T, Ha, and Di: Goodbye.
Bet: I’ll take your mugs. (Takes the mugs off the table, puts them on a tray)
Exeunt everyone except Alfred. (BETSY stage right, OTHERS stage left)
Al: Well, I’d better be going too. I wonder how Sara’s getting along with her spinning?
Exit Alfred stage left. End Scene